it all adds up
Thursday, January 5 
A friend asked me last week if I make resolutions for the New Year. Not really. But I do like to pause and look over my shoulder at the past year, then re-set my intentions for the New Year.
Sort of woo-woo and "you-ness" (not Eunice) sounding I know, but it works for me. Resolutions seem black and white, unforgiving. They remind me of the ten years I struggled with bulimia in my teens and early 20s. I was either on my program counting calories and exercising, or scarfing down four pieces of cheesecake, filled with guilt and self-loathing. There was rigor or failure, but no compassion.
So anyway, I recently attempted to take mental stock of the past year, and couldn’t come up with anything. Maybe nothing much happened? Luckily I have this blog, which reminded me that plenty of life — good and bad — happened in 2011:
January
Started the “Your Turn” segment of this blog, and began getting to know readers better.
February
Sent Oldest Son to Panama and started the ongoing journey of letting him go, despite fears and the ouch of missing him.
March
Completed three new Nordic ski challenges with friends: Skied overnight during the Equinox Ski Challenge, helped my team win the GVLT Skiathon, skied from the exterior of Yellowstone National Park to the interior (Fawn Pass to Mammoth).
May
Celebrated becoming a two-earner family again after Shawn got a high school teaching job.
Mourned loss of sweet, caring friend and former co-worker Laura, who took her own life.
Flew to Maryland and reconnected with a grandma and extended family I haven’t seen in far too long.
June
Last of my boys, the baby of the family, became a teenager.
Dealt with public humiliation related to work.
July
Flew with family to Panama to visit and travel with Oldest Son. Learned about high expectations and that stuffing five people into cheap hotel rooms for ten days = stress.
August
Oldest Son came home from his study abroad after six months away. (Happy, happy!)
September
Made peace with the number 43.
Oldest and Middle Son attended first formal high school dances.
October
Won a bag of meat at the Raw Deal 10k run for being first woman to finish. (I never win. I won!)
November
Went to spend time with my mom after she had a stroke. Turned out she's fine, but has a heart ablation ahead of her to deal with the situation that caused the stroke.
December
Oldest Son turned 18.
Held a minor catastrophes hootenanny, even though the mere notion made me anxious.
Said goodbye to a dear friend of Shawn’s who died in an avalanche on New Year’s Eve day.
Sounds like a year to me. I’m guessing you had one too? Here’s a first go at what I want more of — besides world peace, sane politics, end to third-world famine, environmental restoration, better economy, etc. — in 2012:
- Improved work situation
- Road trip somewhere new in U.S.
- Veggies (More healthy eating, less sugar, caffeine and alcohol. Maybe buy a juicer and start drinking those yicky looking green drinks? Note to self: Get greens growing earlier in garden this year.)
- Pay off last of credit card debt and begin saving again.
- Read more. Talented writers help me live and write better. On my list for this next year: Nutrition & Wellness/The China Study, Kris Carr’s Crazy, Sexy Diet; Financial Independence/Your Money or Your Life, Personal Finance for Dummies; Classics I should have already read/My Antonia, Crossing to Safety; Cooking/Kitchen Confidential; Fiction/Mink River, The God of Animals, In Zanesville. Any other recommendations?
- Intervals/speed work to keep me excited for races (both skiing and trail running).
- Connection (with people! I need people — even when I’m grumpy and inside myself).
- Unplugged time (with Shawn, the boys, friends, alone…trail running, backpacking and on rivers).
Best wishes for 2012 and the good stuff we all want more of this year.
END NOTE: Thanks to the talented Ben over at www.geraldthesheep.com, who generously gave me permission to use his cartoon, even though he's never met me before, which seems like probably a good thing.
Reader Comments (9)
I have a reading recommendation! "The Abyssinian" ( by some french guy..um I'll look it up and get back to you.) It is so well written, love the authors voice, his observations, his charming main character. You know, I hate those books that are so good, such "great literature" and classics that everyone should read but such downers you know, just depressing and not alot of fun. (grapes of wrath anyone? catcher in the rye??) This book in NOT that book, it is fun to read. It IS great literature but I don't recommend it for that reason, I recommend it in the same way I would recommend going down a waterslide, for the hoot of it.
The authors name is Jean-Christophe Rufin.
Such a nice concise new years letter to your readers. I have enjoyed getting to know you and the boys better in your blogs . May this year be better than last year.
First of all , so sorry for Shawn to have lost a friend. It's been a loss felt at our youngest's school as well. Please pass on to Shawn our condolences.
Second, love your message. I, too, feel the same about resolutions. I instantly feel that if I make them then it's guaranteed that they will be broken. I just can't handle that kind of let down. So, I think about things to improve and view them as more like guidelines to hopefully improve things for myself and for my family for the better.
I like your list and it has inspired me to actually sit down, think about what specifically I'd like to see myself improve and to write it down. Thanks for always having a great, inspirational, educational, informative, heartfelt and entertaining blog. I very much appreciate your openness and willingness to share with us! Happy New Year, Megan and family!
I'm so sorry for the loss of Shawn's friend. My sympathies.
Nice New Year list. Pretty similar to mine. Except for that cross-country skiing thing. Can't do that here.
I also have a book recommendation. "Behind the Scenes at the Museum" by Kate Atkinson. It's her debut novel, a multi-generational family story with a little mystery, a bit of melodrama, some comedy and wonderfully eccentric characters.
Happy New Year to you and everyone.
I have a book(s) recommendation: The Hunger Games trilogy. It's a young adult series, but it was really good. I finished reading all 3 books in less than a week. No, I wasn't working so having all day with not a lot to do helped.
May your new year be filled with educational experiences and joy.
Well, very realistic resolutions! Good luck! -Sarah-
Beautiful list that kinda kicks the "I'm not enough" insecurities down a couple of notches. Perfect way to look back and look forward. Here's to your intentions for the new year!
Great list. For the past 5 years, I ended my list of new year's resolutions. Since some of the items on my list are repeatedly written year by year, I decided to just make it plain and simple. Just one great wish that I would want for myself and my family is for us to maintain a healthy and happy lifestyle and just enjoy life while we still have a lot of time to do this.