my mother for forty-two years...
Wednesday, August 4 
I never have to strain to remember how old my mom is: pregnant with me at 19, we are 20 years apart. In some ways the gap of those two decades seems to lessen the older we get. I don’t mean that she’s any less my mother, but we’ve also become friends, sisterly in some ways…I worry about whether she’s retiring too soon and will be bored, whether she got a mammogram this year, and she probably has her list of worries about me.
I’ve mentioned before that we’ve had our rollercoaster years; times when we both theoretically knew we loved each other, but it was a challenge to access it. I know for sure we didn’t always like each other. Sometimes I wonder if my sons are as critical of me as I was of my mother growing up.
Me and my mom at 15 and 35 years old.
I can still occasionally be heard saying to my mom, “You’re bossy, you act like a princess and I have NO IDEA how dad puts up with you some days.” (This is a woman who packs five pairs of shoes for a weekend getaway, in a bag she has no plans to heft herself.) To which she replies, “So? What’s your point?”
My mom is a kick. After Shawn first met her years ago he looked at me and said, “Well. That explains a lot.”
And I didn’t cringe. In fact, I felt rather proud.
In any case, I’m thankful to have a good connection with my mom. Along with the list of eye-rollers I still feel inclined to list at times (thank goodness she doesn’t have a blog), I can tell you she’s smart, funny, well-read, generous, insightful and more. Most of all though, I still need her, and I know she needs me too.
Mom and me camping together last month in Wyoming. Mom is 62, and I'll soon be 42.
Happy Birthday, Mom!
END NOTE: Just to prove that what goes around comes around, I was saying something (I can’t even remember specifically what) to Oldest Son the other day and he made this weird face, then didn’t speak. “What?!” I said to him.
He didn’t reply. “Let me guess: I’m an idiot?” I asked.
“Yes,” he replied solemnly.
Reader Comments (5)
geeze you are the mirror image of your mother. And I thought I looked like mine. The one of her at 35 ,just take off the glasses and that could be you. What a nice tribute to your mother on her birthday. I think all daughters if they are honest have eye roll moments about their mothers. Just wait till oldest son grows up and he will think you are smart and wonderfull too. Have fun in NYC and think of me.
Very lovely! I'm alternately hopeful and jealous when I read about the connections between mothers and daughters. My mom and I are having one of those decades, but I'm sure things will be good again. So glad that the two of you are enjoying each other!
Not sure I understand what's wrong with packing five pair of shoes for a weekend; sounds about right to me. But, speaking of weekends, have a great one.
What a BLESSING moms are! And how mine put up with me as a know-it-all and (oh, I love your word) asshat, I have no clue. Mom gave me a great example to follow when my own dear darlings are being pointy-headed, and sometimes I even follow that great example.
That photo of her with you as a baby - what GREAT HAIR! Give her my best.
Your mom is a kick. What a great birthday tribute.
I had to laugh about the shoes (oh how I love shoes) because for our two day car campout my hubby packed three pair. EH?